deko selber machen und verkaufen
hi everybody it's me, markiplier. you can you can believe me! i ain't fake! believe me i ain't fake! it's the real deal! it's the real deal! 100% authentic! hundred percent authentic...markimoo. markimoo! straight from the source. straight from the source. the source being.. my mom's vagi- anyway.. anyway! it's...it's me.
*babyplier struggles to find words* it's- it's me. you know it's me, ca- oh, shit. you you know it's me, oh shit, because i'm a because i'm a god damn mess, goddamn mess of a klutz, and i have no i'm a klutz, and i have no god damn idea what i'm doing. goddamn idea what i'm doing. so yes, i shaved.
so yes, i shaved. why? i'm gonna get to that! why? i'm gonna get to that! but first, i'm gonna cry! first i'm gonna cry. so, why? so why why why why why oh god why why, why, why?! why, oh god why?! ohh, lorde, why?!
oh i cry to the heavens, why? oh, i cry to the heavens! why?! ...you guys are saying. i'm not saying that. you- you guys are saying that, i'm not saying that. it's just like, i shaved my beard, what big deal is it to me? it's just like shaved my beard whuh not a big deal to me, but you guys out there who but you guys out there, who are currently burning your effigies of me made out of gum in their closet, are currently burning your effigies of me,
made out of gum in your closet, wait! hold that torch! wait! hold that torch! don't do it yet! don't do it! please, for the love of god! please, for the love of god, i need the subs :c i need the subs! there's a reason, why i shaved, and it'll make sense.. because of the game i'm playing! and i'm playing a gaame! there is a reason why i shaved, and it'll make sense because of the game that i'm playing!
and i'm playing a game!! :d look at me! i am playing pewdiepie's look at me! i am playing "pewdiepie's tuber simulator," and, tuber simulator and, aw shit, there goes sponsor eagle. awh, shit, there goes a sponsor eagle. come back!! come back sponsor eagle! come back! come back sponsor eagle!
please...okay, anyway, so you probably pleease! ok, anyway, so, you probably know about the game already, i've actually been playing since the game first came out. know about the game already i've actually been playing since the game first came out but it was a little buggy but it was a little buggy, the server stuff wasn't working right away, so, i was playing it and it's now to
so i was playing it, and it's now to a point where it's actually, fully, working. not.. a point where the game is actually fully working! not fully working because fully, working, cause there's these three sections over here that, i dunno what they're doing, there's these three sections over here that i don't know what they're doing. and why is there a heart in a box? and why is there a heart in a box? is that when
is that when you whore yourself out to youtube and do anything, you whore yourself out to youtube and do anything and everything for subs? which and everything, for subs? which is, is exactly what i'll do. exactly what i'll do.. i'll do absolutely anything.. for more subscribers.. holy shit! i'll do absolutely anything for more subscribers... holy shit literally i will do anything...
literally, i will do anything.. anything.. anything. for more subscribers. like, jesus... for more subscribers... *flashbacks to pumpkin carving challenge* like.. jesus! so anyway, this game- oh! sponsor eagle! ahh sponsor eagle!!
i got you, you bitch! i got you, you bitch. so in case you guys don't know, the basic premise of the game on the whole design the whole design is to funnel as much money towards felix as possible, is to funnel as much money towards felix as possible which i'm willing to do which i'm willing to do, because i'm gonna fucking watch this ad
because i'm gonna fuckin' watch this ad! yeeaah! yeaaaah >:u okay cool. anyway, so, now that we got that ok, cool, anyways, so, now that we got that out of the way, that increased our rewards out of the way that increased our rewards. and the rewards are becoming the and the rewards, are becoming the world's greatest tuber.
world's greatest tuber which is what i am which is what i am. ...maybe i don't know. and oh, here's the reason maybe, i dunno. and- oh, here's the reason! oh god, you were-you were- oh god you were you your mid you were mid-burn of the effigy, and i got completely sidetracked as to burn of the effigy and i completely got sidetracked as to....
why i shaved my beard! why i shaved my beard!! ok, here's why. you ready? okay, here's why. you ready? sit down unless you're already sit down. unless you're already sitting down, then stand up. sitting down, then stand up. and if you're and if you're doing none or either, then..
doing one of either, then lie down, lie down horizontally. horizontally. this is a really stupid reason, this is a really stupid reason! but i'm but i'm playing tuber simulator. playing tuber simulator and it's kinda and it's kinda like.. like i'm doing the whole adventure over
i'm doing the whole adventure over again! again so i wanted to shave my beard so, i wanted to shave my beard, because back when i had ninety-nine because back when i had 99 thousand subscribers, i didn't have a beard! thousand subscribers i didn't have a beard. *forcing back laughter* i was just a young, pre-pubescent 22-year-old... that was desperately making videos... in my mom's basement!
and that's a fact! so i wanted to get back to my roots ergo babyplier that's not what a babe ergo.. baby-plier that's not "what a babe!",that's "man-baby" that's a man-baby babyplier is here to babyplierâ„¢ is here to entertain you,
and horrify you, with mah face. so, now that i got that out of the way, let's get to the game. uhh, basically, this is me. i am authorized on this, if you see, this is my actual account! i almost have a million followers on here, which isn't nearly enough!
so if you guys wanna, you know, maybe actually follow someone, and play this game, you might wanna follow thew guy with a warfstache here, and while you're at it, make all of your friends subscribe to markiplier on youtube, i don't know why they wouldn't be already. well, you should be out there everyday, knocking on doors! to make sure! they see mah videos! and send me gifts! because that's one of the things that's working now, that wasn't working before. i'm gonna send.. my one friend a gift..
and then recieve.. 1,432,774 gifts. thanks, guys! wah-poom! woow! oh my god! i just reached 100,000 subscribers! ðÿž‰ go, me, go!!! aaaaaaaahhhh!!!! ok, anyway.
ok, so, that's what makes this interesting, is because of the social aspect of it... you get to give and recieve gifts, but now that the s-servers are actually working it's almost broken, for someone with alot of followers, because.. lot of followers because i can immediately go back i can immediately go back and sponsor eagle! sponser eaggleee aghh aah! because you can immediately go back in, receive 415 gifts.
and then it-it's exactly the same amount of giftage, from 415, versus 1 million, 4 hundred thousand so you can see how.. it's a little broken for me, but i'm ok! i'm okay with this, because this is totally fine in my mind. 79 gifts? sure, what the heck? i get to go back repeatedly, do that over and over again, and i only have to wait like, 10 seconds in between.
so if you want that to happen in your game.. get a lot of followers! put your tuber channel is the comments and everybody get a big follow chain goin' on! sponsor eagle! let's watch another ad! awh! awh, shit man! that's awesome. the other half of the game is improving your tuber roomage, and as you can see, i've almost completely filled my rååm (sic), because that's the status,
of what makes a good youtuber: how cluttered, your room is, with random garbage. so, i've kinda specialized in comedy and science. which is like my ideal, and if i actually had talent, i'd do that. but i don't. so i won't. i'll just fucking cry about it also you level so i'll just.. fuckin' cry about it.
but, also, you level up. right now, i'm level right now, i'm level 16 and i have 242 bux, and i haven't bought a single one. they've all been from, gifts, from my.. awesome followers! thanks guys- ohp, more?! oh, hoh, alright then! oh, more gifts? aw, you guys are too kind! guys are to kind well time to go check up
well, time to go check on- oh? what's that? whats that?!?! oh my gosh... oh...more? oh my gosh! m-m-more? you guys are so sweet! oh-hoh, thank you so much! i love you guys! ohh, this is the beest! oh, it's so- *gasp* what's that? ohh! ohh, for me?
thank you! these fake, digital numbers, are definitely a replacement for happiness! the other part of the game is decorating your rååm (sic). and then the other, lesser part of the game is actually making videos, which is something that.. honestly, i don't even need to do it at this point, if you're in my shoes, you could just.. farm subs, from your.. follower's gifts, it's it's amazing, but anyway, if you don't want to do that, you can do other stuff, like ohh, i can watch another ad! yes! build!
traadee!!!!â¡â¡ nice… conquerrrâ¡â¡â¡â¡â¡â¡â¡ oh, shit dude. oh, god! anyway, you do that to get boosts. i mean, why- why the fuc- oh god! yeahh. cause why would you not?
so i already made those videos, and i collected the sweet subscribers out of them, the delicious, delectable- *slurps* subscribers. and then you make more videos, but now that i got the boost from selling my soul and watching some ads, i get to make- none of these are comedy/science aah, i guess bleach cures acne.
ok, so if you didn't know, bux are like the currency that you actually pay money for, the views and the subs are the things that you get in the game. but! ohh, sponsor eagle! also, in the gifts that you get, it's not a direct correlation to the number, but in the gifts you get from your followers, you'll also get gifts.. as items in the game, which are things you put in your studio to make sure that you are better at whatever the hell you specialize in doing. so, i've got alot of gifts. some of them are low level.. some of them are low-level which is fine which is fine...
a-and this is how you level up, like, you get fan gifts, you get gifts from your fans and you will level up throughout the game, you'll just like, automatically level up, just form getting these gifts from people, and i get so. many. gifts, like, my. god! and then you get knowledge from that, but you don't get subscribers from the gifts, or leveling up, but you do get them from the gifts from your fans. so, right now, it's just kind of a bonanza, like a non-stop opening of gifts. it's like a.. never-ending cycle of gift giving, and that's kinda why i'm glad that even though i have 1 million 400 thousand gifts waiting for me, i don't have to open, 1 million 400 thousand gifts, and wait for them to get through, to just caps it off at- sponsor eagle!
nooooooo! sponsor eagle! oh god! where is he? eh. is he... ha got you, more now we're getting haa! got you. moore! now we're getting into the high level gifts, so these are the things that are gonna kick me up a few notches. bayum! so anyway, this is a game! like, i'll *mumbles into nothing-ness* i'll get back to the actual game very soon here, but first i just gotta get through all the gifts, because.. i can't just leave 'em here, that'd bother the shit outta me.
em' here that bother the shit out of me ok, so as you get levels, you get knowledge, and knowledge is really what empowers you as a creator, and allows you to make everything that you absolutely need to make, throughout your tuber career. i know this! everyone knows this! you ask anybody, that has ever watched my videos, they'll tell you, "i got smarter.. as the years go on." sponsor eagaaaaale!
alright, so here's the meat of the matter: the customization. and that's what eeverybody cares about. so, if you go into these things, you can actually go to the store here, unlock all of the bullshit that you just unlocked from leveling up and get sweet, views and subs out of just pressing a bunch of buttons. talk about instant gratification!
sponsoor eeaaaaggllleeee! see, my objective is to make my place look like the biggest shithole that ever was, but kind of keep an area clear so that the webcam, from behind, it looks like my place is clean. let's see heerree. eenie, meenie, yeah that's me. *babyplier wails at nothing* yeah, that looks like me! well, that looks like me in like 40 years or something, but anyway, sponsor eaaagle! once you do that, and you've unlocked everything that you need to unlock, which took a long time, because my god everything moves so fast in this game for me,
but, you can actually buy.. things! which is great! it's what everyone wants to do! ohh, a bucket to piss in! oh hell yeah! see, i just try to find.. the places where i can absolutely squeeze.. just.. absolutely everything in here, so.. everything in here so. boink how about how boink! alright, how about.. how about a nice drink teenie to commemorate the.. about a nice drink-tini to commemorate the-the olden days of drunk minecraft!
that'd be nice.. oh! a spider! oh a spider oh perfect well where can oh, perfect! oh, where can i squeeze you? ahh.. right.. ready and waiting for that cat to wake up! just lurking behind the turd.. lies a dark secret.. better sleep with one eye open.. little puss.. alright, so, in the meantime, you can either play puggle, which i'll show you, is-is a giant bag of dicks, because.. eh.. yo-you might as well just randomly, blindly assemble it wherever the hell it wants to go, because,
like, it's not gonna love you. [mark mumbling intensifies] aayyyyy! you get time reduction for playing puggle on your shipments, which take.. right now, they take up to a day. niice. niiice! not nice! no-naw, stupid! alright, i'm gonna stroke my non-existent beaarrd, and then hope for the best! nope, this is not-nope, yeah, straight down the right side!
it was practically rocketing into death! yeeeaaaahhhh! hell yeah! 10% reduction! now, there we go! chica wouldn't do this to me. chica wouldn't screw me over like this! also, chica would probably get stuck in there, cause she's much bigger.. and, uh.. she'd probably just end up shitting all over the place.
actually, it was funny. now that i-i, i forgot to mention, uh.. when i shaved.. i went to say "hi" to chica and she was just a little scared of me.. cause she didn't recognize, uhh.. who i was.. at first, at first. when she got close, she was like "oh, it's you!", but it.. at fist, she was like, "what the hell happened to you?!"
so now that these are done, ha-boom! a-bing, bang, bim! yeah! i got a bucket of piss! hey, ma! *jack will be proud* you don't have to come get it for me anymore! maahhhh! oh, and also, you can complete quests throughout the game. so you get quests, you can re-fill em' if you got the bux. i do, so...
i'll refill them, i don't want music videos- i can watch an ad, oh boy! yeah, that's the thing about this game, it's legitimately fun because of how well made it is, and, like, you get too see, like, your-your comparison rankings among your friends, you get to see, like, the comparison rankings between all the people in revelmode here, and then there's my channel, a-and then my real channel up at the top there, but someday, i'll get up to you, markiplier! and that's why i shaved my beard! because this is me, down at #12,
looking up, at #2 up there.. oh, man, someday! someday, big buddy! someday, i'll be up there for ya! so, anyway, i think i've showed you pretty much everything in the game, so i'll leave it at that. so, thank you everybody so much for watching, and thank you everybody for putting up with the, uhh..
horrifying visage that you see in front of you, but worry not! it is true! i never age, but, also, you'll never suspect that this is actually a clone that escaped from the clone basement, and soon enough, the authorities will be taking him back down there and mashing him up into a pulp to make, heh, even more clones. *outro music: crazy la paint, starts* you guys wouldn't even imagine that! na-haw, i'm timeless! but, anyway, this is baby-face markiplier from 2012, signing off.
thank you everybody, so much for watching, and, as always, i will see you.. in the next video! buh-bye! [subtitles credited in the description…] [it's mean to put it in the video] [have a great day!]